Why can we talk about it? Let me give you an example. In the 1930s, there was a very famous educated woman named Guo Wanying in Shanghai. She eventually got married to a wealthy and wealthy fianc é, but due to an incident, she decided to withdraw from the marriage and not be together anymore.
What's the matter? His fianc é bought her a pair of American made stockings. At that time, it was fashionable for girls to wear stockings, but what did he say to her? You can wear these stockings, the quality is quite good, and they won't break even if you wear them for five or six years.
Because the two of them didn't know much before, Guo Wanying proposed to divorce based on this sentence. Why? The matter of improving the quality of life was described as so vulgar by him. He said that having a long family and we are not short of money. A person's life is too long, and marriage is even more difficult to endure. I want to be with interesting people and be able to talk to them. You are such a boring person, and we have nothing to talk about.
You see, this is what we mean by consistent ideas and values. Consistency in values is particularly important. The concept of consistency in values does not mean that I want to be an official, you also want to be an official, I want to get rich, and you also want to get rich. No. But if I want to become an official and make a fortune, then you should be a good wife and mother. In order to live a better life and make a fortune, we can temporarily endure some hardships.
If you enjoy hiking and playing in the mountains and waters, then I am also a petty bourgeois. Let's play together, this is called aligning our values. It means that both parties have common pursuits or perspectives on things.
In "Dream of the Red Chamber," Jia Baoyu has a saying that goes, "It is said that there is a good relationship between gold and jade, but I only think of the alliance between wood and stone." What does this mean? Jin Yu Liang Yuan, Jin Xue Bao Chai, Yu Jia Bao Yu, they all think we are a perfect match. No, I am more compatible with Sister Lin. She is wood, I am stone, I am just a stone. I only think of the alliance between wood and stone. Why is he like this? It's because he shares the same values as Lin Daiyu, but not with Jin Xue.